tieks

tieks by selisabeth17 featuring flats

Beautiful, Beautiful Fall

This past weekend I finally went hiking in one of Jirisan's courses. 18.4 km later, and my friend and I had sore feet, calves, and dirty faces, but I would do it all again in a heart beat, even with the fresh blisters on my feet. Something about getting to wander underneath the fall foliage in all its bursts of colors and away from modern civilization (really no millions of people, wires, pipes, cars...) makes me feel a little like Anne Shirley when she gets to fall in love with Prince Edward Island. Everything is romantic, and even while the paths were literally rocky and the end seemingly never near, it's hard to be disgruntled with perfect sunshine and inspiring surroundings at every turn. I wanted to share some photos from the hike as well as some quotes I found about fall. They'll give you this warm, satisfied feeling!

"...September is dressing herself in showy dahlias and splendid marigolds and starry zinnias. October, the extravagant sister, has ordered an immense amount of the most gorgeous forest tapestry for her grand reception. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

"Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns." - George Eliot

"...I cannot endure to waste anything so precious as autumnal sunshine by staying in the house. So I have spent almost all the daylight hours in the open air." -Nathaniel Hawthorne

One Year Later...

It has officially been a full year since I packed two suitcases and a backpack and moved across the world. A lot has changed, and a lot hasn't changed, and when I looked back through this blog, I'm glad I kept it up. Around this time last year I wrote a post explaining why I decided to teach ESL in Korea, and I like to think I've fulfilled my goals of being here for a year.

My Happiness. If you haven't noticed an ongoing theme, I was really unhappy towards the end of my senior year. Like sometimes would barely leave my bed for the whole day unhappy, say hurtful or just rude things just because... I had serious FOMO, and I was constantly plagued with this fear that I was constantly being forgotten. For my whole adolescence, I would get really upset at what I perceived was either a) people forgetting about me or b) people purposely seeming like they forgot because they didn't really want me there. Of course, I never explained how much this hurt my feelings. I usually let it build up, turned a bit of an icy shoulder, and then I lashed out much later or at random times. I'd also bury myself in work, using it as a buffer between me and the feeling of being forgotten, which was a gateway to feeling very alone. I can think of a few very specific times that I did this like clockwork. 

Anyhow, my goal was to really try and push for my own happiness, and I think I've successfully gotten there. I'm not wildly happy and full of spirited "You can do it!" But I'm not spending all day in bed Facebook stalking all the fun times everyone else seems to be having.

My Career. I remember telling this guy I hated in high school how I was going to be a fabulous New York socialite with a closet full of beautiful shoes and invitations to all the best parties and a powerful job in advertising. Gag me. Call it college happening, but I can think of nothing I want less. I don't want to live in NYC because I hate the cold. I don't want a ton of shoes because I just won't wear them. I don't want to go to parties because no one dances, and I have to be uncomfortable and sober while making small talk for hours. I don't want to be a socialite because... what does that even mean? And while advertising is still on the table, it's going to be for companies I care about not just blanket advertising to the biggest spender.

I frankly don't even know what my career is going to be, and as I told my dad, it's not going to be traditional or familiar. I'm out in the world, I'm seeing new things, and I'm exploring. Right now I frankly don't want anything else. As much as I've always wanted marriage and babies and a cute little castle with a massive garden and an apple orchard in the backyard (hey, dream big, right?), I don't want it right now if it means giving up whatever path I'm on. I've renewed for another year in Korea because there's a lot to still see, and there's a lot more I want to learn as a teacher. I do have some more finite desires, namely a graduate school course in Germany or Ireland (though Germany is looking pretty good right now), a future with linguistics, and working with companies I admire. I'm also interested in the idea of micro loans, so if you know anything about that let me know.

Writing. Speaking of my career, the most important thing to me is writing. The novelist dream will always be there. I've started reading so much more, and it's been wildly therapeutic in a weird way. Good books are good for the soul, no matter what anyone says. And I mean good books, with rich characters, a Roller Coaster of a plot, and this ability to grip something in you and never let go no matter how many years pass. I've been reading those kinds of books lately, and it's been amazing. 

I've also started writing again. Nothing big, and never consecutive. Just snippets here and there of observations, imaginations of my favorite characters, and more. But it's something, and it feels good to not sit there, wondering how to phrase something.  

Kiki's Delivery Service (1989)

You know how a lot of movies from our childhood don't quite wind up being as amazing when we become adults? Well, I re-watched Kiki's Delivery Service (which for whatever reason, I kept calling Kiki's Great Adventure), and I'm happy to say it's just as good as it was when I was seven. Maybe even better because now I can appreciate the artwork that went into the scenery, the people. and the details. Miyazaki brings us into a charming little world that is neither really here nor there, neither in the past or the future. It's just this sweet place where even grocery shopping can seem enchanting. I will say Kiki's abruptness is not something that would fly with anyone I know (like telling your dad you're leaving for your year of training while he's packing for your camping trip!), it doesn't affect the film really. I think it goes without saying, but Miyazaki is quite the genius.

Fall is Here

Autumn is here, and I'm very excited about it. If spring is about new beginnings, autumn is all about nostalgia and pausing to remember. Crisp mornings lend to long, thoughtful walks. Bright colors lend to bursts of inspiration. Harvest time lends way to all my favorite home-comfort foods like apple pies, pumpkin everything, soup, and piping hot cups of tea over breakfast. I'm not one to get really and truly homesick, but the thought of the season does make me miss the way my mom decorates our house for both Halloween and Thanksgiving and the ways I'd try to convince my dad to light a fire every night, even if it was a warmer November evening. I want to bury myself in cable knit sweaters and fuzzy socks and drink hot cider while reading a good book (in this case Wild Girl by Kate Forsyth) or daydreaming. 

From A Clothes Horse

From Living it Rural

@erincraul

From Sullivan Entertaiment

On Viola Davis's Win

She's freaking amazing. I love this. I love her. I love "How to Get Away with Murder" (seriously needs to get back on air rn). I love how excited she was to win. I love Kerry Washington tearing up in the audience. I love Taraji P. Henson, standing up and applauding. I love that these strides are being made.

Whether you believe it or not, these are strides that have to be made.  

Zimmermann S/S 16

By far my favorite collection for the S/S 2016 fashion shows thus far. I love the unapologetic romance of the cuts, the necklines, and the details. Nicky and Simone are actually getting me to like choker necklaces with their delicate, lace versions paired with the higher, Victorian-esque necklines. Inspiration for this show comes from an children's book called, Seven Little Australians, published in 1894. Nicky Zimmermann said, "I love the idea of an underlying naughtiness with these classic fabrications," and Vogue's Nick Remsen observes a balance between formal and easy in his review.

Agreed. Can't wait to see how these looks will be worn everyday. There is something easy about the way the dresses are cut, like maybe I could see myself throwing one on with mussed up hair and flats or even Chucks for a day around town.

Images from vogue.com and zimmermann-sydney.tumblr.com

Boseong Green Tea Fields

Went with a friend to Boseong's famous green tea fields, and they were absolutely stunning (particularly in the rain). I'll be writing a proper post on There She Goes Again, but I thought I'd share some of my favorite photos here. She has a much nicer camera than mine, so it was fun to play around with.

Style is Eternal

In case you've missed it, the Bowes Museum in England has collaborated with Fondation Pierre Bergé-Yves Saint Laurent to put on an exhibition celebrating YSL's life and works. Having started this past July and continuing until October, Yves Saint Laurent: Style is Eternal will peer into YSL's vision as well as his overall influence on women's fashion. If you're in England, check out the exhibit, which will include fifty of his most iconic pieces, including garments from the Russian Collection, the Mondrian dresses, and the Tuxedo.

To celebrate this new exhibition, Farfetch has invited me to put together an outfit around the iconic Saint Laurent Le Smoking Tuxedo Jacket as a part of their competition, keeping in mind, "Fashion fades, style is eternal." It sounded fun, so I thought I'd scan the Saint Laurent collection on Farfetch to put together a classic but modern outfit that highlights this beautiful jacket.

I started by pulling classic outfits and accessories with a playful and modern twist. Instead of a classic black trouser, leather adds a bit of texture, and the lipstick motifs add a fun twist on the classic YSL lipstick. I finished off the look with a simple black heel and black sunglasses, tying everything together with the Le Smoking Jacket, thrown on and left unbuttoned to add an element of ease to the the final look. Wear with simple make-up, some mussed up hair, and maybe a red pedicure to tie the look together.

Thank you to Farfetch for inviting me to participate in this competition!

Read more about the exhibit: here.

Links to all the pieces here:

• Saint Laurent Le Smoking Tuxedo Jacket
• Saint Laurent Striped Sweater
• Saint Laurent Skinny Lambskin Jeans
• Saint Laurent Lipstick Pendant
• Saint Laurent Monogram Shoulder Bag
• Saint Laurent "Classic 51" Sunglasses
• Saint Laurent "Jane" Sandals

The Packing List

I'm going home, wahoo!! Not for good, but for a short vacation! I'll be going to California for a week before flying to Pennsylvania for another week. And I'm pretty excited to be on good, ole 'Murican soil for a bit before returning for a second year in Korea. At home I'll be finishing up for the launch of There She Goes Again, spending time with my friends and family, cuddling with my dog, and enjoying proper, well circulating air conditioning. Korea, I luh ya, but this heat wave is killing my soul. I leave the house for maybe an hour for errands, and I come back exhausted and ready to pass out. It's hot. 

Because of this desire to minimize my chances of sweating, and to prevent me from bringing too much back from the States, I am bringing as little as possible with me on this vacation. As in I have five, very easy outfits total for this whole trip home with the intent of washing at some point. I have narrowed down my packing to one regular sized suitcase (which will also hold my camera bag), and my purse (as seen above). In fact, the reason I can't use my carry-on sized suitcase is because of all the souvenirs I'm bringing home for friends and family. I'm talking five selfie sticks a lot....

Anyhow, here is the list of my clothes for the trip! You can use the same formula for your own wardrobe.

Airplane: 

Dress + Tank + Sweater + Sandals

Everyday Clothes:

• 2 Dresses
• 2 Skirts
• 2 Shirts or Tanks
• 1 Pair of So-Comfy-You-Could-Do-Yoga-In-Them Pants
• 7 Pairs of Underwear
• 5 Bras

Workout Clothes: 

• 2 Tanks
• 2 Pairs of Shorts
• 2 Sports Bras
• 3 Pairs of Socks

Accessories:

• 1 Bracelet
• 1 Necklace
• 1 Watch

That's it! Even if there isn't a washing system at the places I'm staying, it's very easy to hand wash things and let them dry overnight. You could easily fit this all in a carry on sized suitcase and last quite a while.

Some Reflection and Such

Miss me? I know, I know. I've been gone for quite a while! Not really if you follow me on social media, but on this blog I've seemingly dropped off the face of the planet. It's one of those sorry, but not actually sorry kind of things. As you know, I'm working on the launch of There She Goes Again, so 99% of my blogging and web-siting energy is going into that baby. I'm really excited for its launch, and I'm currently trying to build up its audience pre-debut while pulling my "Samantha Elisabeth" themed presence back to a more personal space. You'll notice (if you're not a follower) SE related social media has changed significantly. The Facebook page is still up and running, but it will most likely change to a page for TSGA. I've completely deleted my Twitter (well, deactivated...it'll become permanent in 30 days), and my Instagram has gone to private.

I've been doing a lot of reflection these past months, considering I've now completed my first year of adulthood, and I decided to renew my contract and stay in Korea another year. I've also said hello and goodbye to a lot of people, as is the nature of being an expat, which is always something I've found difficult to do. Anyhow, now that my head is fully clear from the muddled mess it became with poor diet, little sleep, and a lot of stress (socially and academically) in college, I've been able to focus on aspects of my life outside of finishing work for the next class. Someday I'd love to just be totally off most social media beyond TSGA related platforms. I'd follow blogs I like via Bloglovin or e-mail, and any friends abroad or near, I'd keep in touch via texting apps, e-mail, and letters. I keep thinking to how I was when I was in middle school and early high school before the real boom of social media, and I feel like my concentration was just so. much. better. So that's my personal goal. Get back my focus and sharpen my mind back up again. I'm planning on doing just that with the following:

• Reading more. I've already read more personal choice books than I did in all my college years. And they're not just shit books either, but actual novels with proper dialog, clear narrative, and a good story. I have a Kindle app on which I read newer books, but a lot of expats have left hard copy books behind. I finally collected a bunch with the intention of reading them, particularly at night when I shouldn't really be staring at screens.
• Writing more. Guys, I've always wanted to be a writer. I've wanted to create worlds that suck someone in. I've wanted to break hearts with story lines. I've always had trillions of ideas swirling in my head, and I have countless documents in various folders with stories barely started before abandoned with impatience. I've made a vow to myself that I need to start writing a page everyday about something, anything. No worrying about editing or re-reading necessarily, just getting words onto paper.
• Artsy stuff. Nothing that will turn into a business venture or be something to brag about to friends. Just stuff like sketching random things or doodling patterns or just coloring that will feel therapeutic and entertaining.
• Cooking. I have so many recipes saved onto my phone for meals and healthy desserts, so it's time to start spending more time in the kitchen for more savory meals.
• Language learning. My Spanish has obviously gotten significantly worse from lack of use and impatience when speaking it and trying to get a point across. I've put podcasts, books, and apps on my phone to keep me practicing. I've also started to put more focus on learning Korean and increasing my fluency. I love languages too much to let being out of an education environment derail my ability to learn them.
• Think time. You know, roaming my town, meditation, etc. Unplugging from electronics, period. the. end.

What do you think? I really want to put into practice all these observations on getting outside more, getting away from the technology, so this is how I'm hopefully going to get more focused! 

Thoughts on Caitlyn Jenner

Photo via Vanity Fair

PROBLEM: 

Most people are very happy for Caitlyn Jenner in her recent debut. They wish her well; they wish her happiness. You will be hard pressed to find too many people openly making disparaging remarks or blatantly not supporting her. However, what has caused controversy is that she was recently awarded the ESPY Arthur Ashe Award, and many believe she is undeserving. The three main names many bring to the forefront as more deserving, are Lauren Hill, a freshman basketball player who continued to play the sport while battling terminal brain cancer, Noah Galloway, a former US soldier who lost his left arm and leg in battle but continues to participate in famously difficult fitness competitions, and Jim Kelly, a former NFL player who  has used his fame and personal loss to bring awareness to Krabbe disease (the disease that took his son's life) and to his own battle with squamous cell carcinoma.

PRE-DISCUSSION NOTES:

I. Definitions

As defined by Merriam-Webster Dictionary:

• BRAVE (adj)- facing or dealing with (something dangerous or unpleasant)
• COURAGE (n)- mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty
• HEROIC (adj)- exhibiting or marked by courage and daring

II. What is the Arthur Ashe Award?

Now, from the ESPN website, here is a description of what exactly the Arthur Ashe Award is. I have also underlined and bolded sections to make it a quicker read:

The Ashe Award is one of the most prestigious in sports. Recipients reflect the spirit of Arthur Ashe, possessing strength in the face of adversity, courage in the face of peril and the willingness to stand up for their beliefs no matter what the cost. The award is inspired by the life that Ashe lived, using his fame and stature to advocate for human rights, although, at the time, those positions may have been unpopular and were often controversial. From speaking out against apartheid in South Africa to revealing to the world his struggle with AIDS, Ashe never backed away from a difficult issue, even though doing so would have been easier. Winners of the Ashe Award strive to carry on Ashe's legacy in their own lives - - inspired by those who do so each day.

ESPN has also stated that there are no "runner-ups" for the Arthur Ashe Award or any of the big awards for the ESPYs. [Source]

One also does not have to be or have been  an athlete to receive the award. The past five recipients:

• 2014: Michael Sam, an All-American football player who became the first openly gay man to be drafted into the NFL. 
• 2013: Robin Roberts, a former anchor for ESPN until 2005 and then an anchor for Good Morning America. She has had a public and difficult battle with breast cancer 
• 2012: Pat Summitt, a former college basketball coach who holds the most all-time wins for any NCAA coach in all its history. She has also been public about her battle with Alzheimer's disease.
• 2011: Dewey Bozella, who was wrongfully convicted of murder and spent 26 years in prison before having his sentence overturned. While there he became a light heavyweight boxer, and he eventually got to have his professional fight in 2011.  

III. Who was Arthur Ashe?

Photo via Washington Post

Now, here's a highlight of Arthur Ashe's life and why he has a prestigious award named after him. I used this article as a source:

• Arthur Ashe was an African-American tennis player. 
• He attended UCLA, where his tennis accomplishments included being the first African-American player named to the U.S. Davis Cup team. As a sophomore, he was featured in Sports Illustrated's "Faces in the Crowd." In 1965 he won the individual NCAA championships and contributed significantly to UCLA winning the team NCAA tennis championship.
• Ashe served in the US army from 1966-68, stationed at West Point in New York, reaching the rank of second lieutenant. He also continued participating in tennis tournaments.
• He is the only African-American man to ever win the U.S. Open.
• In 1969 he co-founded the National Junior Tennis League, a program designed to "foster a sense of discipline and attention to academics." Many of the programs in which Ashe would become involved often focused on children, minorities, education, and tennis. The main concern of these programs, though, focused more on teaching life skills rather than trying to become the best at something.
• In 1969, when he was denied an entry visa into South Africa because of Apartheid, he would become a fervent activist for ending Apartheid for the rest of his life.
• In order to protect the interests of tennis players, he helped create the Association of Tennis Professionals.
• When he retired from tennis in 1980 due to continuing pain from a bad heart attack, he ended his career with 818 wins, 260 losses, and 51 titles.
• In his retirement, he was extremely active between continuing contributions to the world of tennis, activism, and education.
• Unfortunately, a surgery in 1983 included an HIV-positive blood transfusion, and Ashe would discover a few years later that he had the virus. He would keep this a secret until 1992.
• He decided to hold a press conference to reveal his disease, and he began to bring awareness to AIDS, which was heavily stigmatized at the time. His AIDS activism included his founding of the Arthur Ashe Foundation for the Defeat of AIDS, a speech to the UN General Assembly on World AIDS Day.
• He was thus awarded the Sports Illustrated's Sportsman of the Year, an award given to an "athlete or team whose performance that year most embodies the spirit of sportsmanship and achievement." I would like to note this is twelve years after he retired from his tennis career. 
• Arthur Ashe died in 1993 and was buried in the Governor's Mansion in Richmond, VA, the first person to lie in state there since Stonewall Jackson (a very famous Confederate general) in 1863. 
• A statue was erected in 1996 on Richmond's Monument Avenue, a place that formerly commemorated Confederate war heroes. The statues is of Ashe holding books in one hand and a tennis racket in the other to symbolize knowledge and tennis. 

IV. What exactly does it mean to be transgender?

Now let's look at a brief description what exactly being transgender means, according to the American Psychological Association (APA), and what its place in society has been. 

Transgender is an umbrella term for persons whose gender identity, gender expression or behavior does not conform to that typically associated with the sex to which they were assigned at birth. Gender identity refers to a person’s internal sense of being male, female or something else; gender expression refers to the way a person communicates gender identity to others through behavior, clothing, hairstyles, voice or body characteristics.

Is being transgender a mental disorder?

A psychological state is considered a mental disorder only if it causes significant distress or disability. Many transgender people do not experience their gender as distressing or disabling, which implies that identifying as transgender does not constitute a mental disorder. For these individuals, the significant problem is finding affordable resources, such as counseling, hormone therapy, medical procedures and the social support necessary to freely express their gender identity and minimize discrimination. Many other obstacles may lead to distress, including a lack of acceptance within society, direct or indirect experiences with discrimination, or assault. These experiences may lead many transgender people to suffer with anxiety, depression or related disorders at higher rates than nontransgender persons.

What kinds of discrimination do transgender people face?  

Anti-discrimination laws in most U.S. cities and states do not protect transgender people from discrimination based on gender identity or gender expression.

Out of a sample of nearly 6,500 transgender people, the report, ["Injustice at Every Turn"] found that transgender people experience high levels of discrimination in employment, housing, health care, education, legal systems, and even in their families.

Many transgender people are the targets of hate crimes. They are also the victims of subtle discrimination—which includes everything from glances or glares of disapproval or discomfort to invasive questions about their body parts.

If you don't think the transgender community is still stigmatized, let's look at the recent headlines not related to Caitlyn Jenner that pop up when one types in "transgender" into the Google News Search Bar (relevant as of June 4, 2015):

• "Transgender people are reported banned from Tinder" | Business Insider
• "Transgender Woman Pushed onto Subway Tracks in App..." | TIME
• "Mike Huckabee's creepy transgender 'joke'" | CNN
• "From Blake to Jessie: a 7-year-old's transgender story" | The Guardian

3/4 of those articles discuss something negative happening to the transgender community.

V. Now, who exactly is Caitlyn Jenner? 

We all know her for a few things under her former name Bruce Jenner. 

• In July 30, 1976, Bruce Jenner won the gold medal back from the Soviet Union for the decathlon at the Montreal Olympics and set a world record until 1980. A decathlon is a combined athletic event that includes: a 100 meter run, long jump, shot put, high jump, 400 meter run, 110 meter hurdles, discus throw, pole vault, javeline throw, and a 1500 meter run spread out over two days. He was given the unofficial title of "World's Greatest Athlete." [Source]
• His step-daughters and daughters with Kris Jenner are famous (often times thought of as infamous) for their reality show, "Keeping Up with the Kardashians." [I hope I don't need to quote a source on that...]
• In an interview with Diane Sawyer, Jenner confirmed a year or two of speculation about who he is and told the world, "For all intents and purposes I am a woman." [Source] To read some of the highlights from the interview, here is The Guardian's article.

DISCUSSION:

You will note that with the above I tried to be as objective and fact-oriented as possible because this is the part I would like to actually share my opinion and thoughts on Caitlyn Jenner winning the Arthur Ashe Award. Here's the TL;DR version of what I'm about to discuss. Keep in mind I am trying to be as logical as possible. 

Caitlyn Jenner deserves to win the Arthur Ashe Award. 

With that said, here is what I am NOT SAYING:

• Lauren Hill, Noah Galloway, and Jim Kelly are less deserving. 
• Any soldiers, cancer survivors, those fighting cancer, athletes, war victims, war heroes, war survivors, etc are less deserving than transgender people.
• Any soldiers, cancer survivors, those fighting cancer, athletes, war victims, war heroes, war survivors, etc are more deserving than transgender people.
• ESPN isn't using this as a publicity stunt.

Here are some facts people get horribly wrong about this whole situation:

• The Arthur Ashe Award has runner ups, and that is why Hill, Galloway, and Kelly were slighted. They weren't. There is no public documentation or press releases that in anyway imply they were runner ups. Because the Arthur Ashe Award doesn't have any. Who were the Arthur Ashe Award runner ups in 2007? No one. Because they don't exist.
• That Caitlyn Jenner declaring she is transgender is just a rich guy dressing up in female clothes, wearing make-up, and undergoing plastic surgery. 
• That being a hero, being brave, and being courageous can only be applied to soldiers. I've seen way too many of those posts on Facebook, and it's so backwards. Soldiers are heroes. Soldiers are brave. Soldiers are insanely, mind-blowingly, beautifully courageous. (Listen, I can't even get hit in the arm without caving like a little bitch, do you know what would happen to me on the battlefield? Death. That would happen. Instant death.) However, Hero, Brave, and Courage are not terms that can only be applied to soldiers or those battling cancer. Are those guys the kickass versions of these terms? Hell, yeah. But that doesn't mean they're the only ones. People go through internal struggles and internal battles, and it's incredibly sad if you don't believe they're not showing bravery in their own lives. 

Before coming out, coverage of Caitlyn Jenner's transition had been an ongoing joke. The speculation and rumors and commentary have been rude, invasive, and they treated Jenner as a freak in the midst of a media circus. Late night comedians have shared their fair share of Jenner-transgender related jokes over the years. Other famous families have shared their downright appall at transgender-related issues (Oh yes, I brought up the Duggars.) The transgender community, as seen in the above APA article, has suffered from discrimination, ignorance, and sometimes downright hatred. Which, one might recall, is how the AIDS community was treated during the eighties and nineties due to misinformation (for pop culture tellings of this, look at Rent and The Normal Heart). You know, the community that Arthur Ashe dedicated his final years to helping via his foundation and UN speech. You know, that work that led to his being named the SI Sportsman of the Year twelve years after he retired from tennis. 

Here's what's been going on after Caitlyn Jenner's Vanity Fair reveal. Comedians have changed their rhetoric. Sure they've still got jokes, but they show a clear respect towards what it means to be transgender. The transgender community has received a ton of positive attention, and one can see this as a highlight in their struggle for acceptance in today's world. Jenner is a public figure, whether its via her Olympic gold status, her not-so-lauded movie and television ventures, or her not-so-lauded, sometimes-lauded Kardashian family. By taking control of the media speculation and conversation via public means (reality show, interview, magazine), she has helped change the conversation concerning the transgender community, and, whether she believes she is a spokesperson or not, she has shed a positive light on the topic. By being on the cover of VF, the conversation around transgender isn't on the defense for once.

So yeah, Jenner hasn't been an athlete since the seventies, but if you look at the award again, you don't have to be a current athlete or even an athlete in the past ten years. And yeah, Jenner wasn't a soldier or a cancer survivor, but that doesn't mean she doesn't show bravery, heroism, or courage (based on their Webster definitions) in her decision to be public about her lifelong battle with herself to become Caitlyn Jenner. Deciding to be openly transgender is still not an easy thing for most of the transgender community, and it is something that has led many to "anxiety, depression or related disorders at higher rates than nontransgender persons" (APA). By doing so and calling it the "new normal," Jenner has provided many with a little more courage in their own lives. 

Now, I don't particularly find the ESPY committee to be totally pure-hearted in their decision to award Jenner the Arthur Ashe Award. Yes, people, you can believe Jenner deserves the award and still mistrust the people giving it to her. Let's be honest, how many people normally tune in to the ESPY Awards each year? Now how many people tune in to the ESPY awards who have little to no interest in sports? Now how many people knew who Arthur Ashe was or what the Arthur Ashe Award was before all of this? I can't give you too many answers to the latter, but I can tell you the ESPY Awards hover around 2.0 million viewers each year. You know how many people watched Diane Sawyer's interview with Jenner? 17 million. I'll let you do the math figuring out what went on in ESPY's minds while they decided on this award. Something along the lines of "Brilliant PR" probably happened at least once in someone's mind even if it wasn't said out loud. 

CONCLUSION:

• Caitlyn Jenner deserves the Arthur Ashe Award based on Arthur Ashe's legacy, based on the award's description, and based on what she has done for the transgender community.
• Arthur Ashe was one amazing person.
• Noah Galloway is a courageous, brave hero.
• Lauren Hill was a courageous, brave hero.
• Jim Kelly is a courageous, brave hero.
• Caitlyn Jenner is a courageous, brave hero.
• My friend who overcame her depression and anorexia is a courageous, brave hero.
• The girls I know from my childhood who are now living their lives after battling cancers that took away their teenage years are courageous, brave heroes.
• These guys are all courageous, brave heroes. 
• The terms Courage, Brave, and Hero are all terms that have broad meanings, and to pigeonhole them into specific categories says more about you than about the people you're choosing or not choosing to apply them to.
• The ESPY committee definitely didn't give the award to Caitlyn Jenner for 100% pure reasons, but you're frankly never going to get the confession out of them, so either watch or don't watch it when it comes on. I have never watched it, so I'm still probably not gonna watch it. 
• Belitting someone just because of perceived injustices (by which I mean the runner up thing that doesn't exist) is rude, bigoted, ignorant, and 100% part of the problem.
• If the ESPY Awards don't at least double their views to hover around 4 million, I will be shocked. Kylie Jenner alone, has about 6x that many followers on Instagram.
• If you made it to the end of this article, I commend you good sir or ma'am, and thanks for reading.

Things You Need in Your Life Now

"Madame Secretary"- This was recommended on one of The Simple Sophisticate  podcasts as a Petit Plaisir, and I decided to give it a shot. After all I love a good government/political drama (hello, "Scandal" and "House of Cards), and I have liked both Tea Leoni and Tim Daly in other shows and movies they were in.

It's such a good show! It avoids going over the top like other dramas do, and it's incredibly realistic in both the daily events and the way the characters are portrayed. There's a little spy drama with Tim Day's character, which hopefully won't become the show's B613 because, let's be honest, we're all ready for that to be over with on "Scandal." The style is on par with Kerry Washington's and Robin Wright's, with a touch of down to earth given Leoni's character. 

George Ezra's Wanted on Voyage- This man's voice... I heard "Budapest," and then I found his other songs on Youtube, and then I went to Amazon and bought the whole damn CD. "Barcelona" is a particular favorite as well as "Over the Creek."

The Secret History by Donna Tartt- You know those books you've had on your shelf (virtual Kindle shelf in my case) for a while? Well, The Secret History has been on mine for quite a while. I can't believe it took me so long to read it. A murder mystery that focuses on the "why" rather than "who" (we know who in the prologue) is less the intrigue than the writing and character descriptions. Anyone who's gone to a small liberal arts college will agree with the descriptions of Hampton College immediately (even though it was twenty years ago!), and even if you haven't, you'll enjoy the various Greek-obsessions, descriptions of college students trying to act like adults, and observations on human tendencies.

Paper Towns by John Green- Another interesting read. I, of course, loved The Fault in Our Stars when I read it during my junior year of college, and if I had read it as a teenager, I would have cried over the fact that Augustus would never exist in my suburban hometown. This book, though, focuses more on the message of breaking free of suburban patterns and less on character development and logistics. Margot is kind of cool, but I honestly wanted to give her a reality check during the book, and Q played that let's-put-her-on-a-pedestal-game way too well. If you want an adventure story, I suggest reading Paper Towns, it's still John Green, but a little different.

Stuff You Missed in History Class- Is it old of me to love podcasts, or am I just behind on the times? I read about this podcast in the comment section of a Buzzfeed article, and I immediately went and downloaded a bunch of episodes. Love. these. ladies. So much fun and the perfect thing to listen to while cooking or getting ready for the day. 

Got any recommendations? 

Favorite Photos from Kyoto

Hey, that kind of rhymed. So one of the reasons besides working on There She Goes Again, that I've been absent is that I've been traveling a lot on the weekends. The weather is warm, I've gotten ahead on my lesson planning, and Korea is coming back to life! We recently had a five day weekend, and my friend, Lynsey, wanted to go to Japan since it's in such close proximity to us (a quick 2 1/2 hour bus ride to Busan and an 1 1/2 flight to Osaka!) We decided to spend our time exploring all of Kyoto and doing a sort of combination between taking it easy and seeing as much as we wanted to see. There will be a full guide on TSGA, but I thought I'd share some of my favorite photos here as well.

If you're wondering, I fully plan on returning to Kyoto. It's beautiful.

Where Have I Been?

Hey. HEY! It's been a while, hasn't it? Not too long, I hope. This blog is going to revert to more a journal-style while I work on a website that will be a bit more professional and focused in terms of its mission. I started Samantha Elisabeth when I returned from my study abroad experiences in order to start keeping tabs, albeit publicly, on my life as I graduated from college and entered a new field. I then proceeded to use it in order to learn more about blogging, internet marketing, and more, trying to figure out how exactly I wanted everything to fit together. 

I would like Samantha Elisabeth to be a bit more personal again, filled with my own photos, inspiration, random babbles, etc. My new website, There She Goes Again, will focus on all things related to travel--information, inspiration, etc. I'm super excited for it to launch, but I want to do it right, make sure I understand all aspects of marketing it and running it as a future business and place for travelers, explorers, and more. I've learned a lot playing around with this blog the past few months, and I'm excited to put what I've learned to use in There She Goes Again. 

I'll be updating this blog a few times a week with tidbits about my life, adventures, and interests, but you may see a few posts begin to disappear as I move them to the new site. If you'd like to get a look at what I'm trying to accomplish with There She Goes Again, here are its social media sites! I am focusing on three main sources: Facebook, Pinterest, and Instagram, so like and follow if you please! The site should launch sometime around the end of the summer.

Facebook

Instagram

Pinterest

Small Hiatus

Hello, friends! Samantha Elisabeth will be taking a small hiatus while I work on an exciting project. If you'd like to keep up, please follow along here:

Facebook: samiam0817

Twitter: @samiam_817

Instagram: @samiam817

Pinterest: @samiam817

And if you want a sneak peak into what I'm working on, follow the new instagram ;)

@thereshegoesagn

The FIVE Best Resources for Expats in Korea

So, now that I've been living in Korea for six months as of April 15th, I can officially tell you this: You will not be uncomfortable living in this little country for at least a year. Once you get the hang of the basics: transportation, housing, banking, food, you'll discover that finding the food you want, learning more about Korea, or just shopping is as easy as owning a laptop or computer. There are very few things I have to do without in this country (none pop into my head specifically right now), and that's thanks to the resources provided by the growing expat community, continuing globalization, and, of course, the handy-dandy internet! Here is my list of the five best resources of expats in Korea as they make home in a foreign country.

EAT YOUR KIMCHI

These guys are the best. I know they've attracted criticism (fair and unfair) in the past few years, particularly when they moved from being teachers to full-time business owners, but there's no denying they do a lot of the research on what's happening in Korea, whether it be food, trends, or more. They talked about what we all wondered when we watched K-pop videos (SJ, "Because I naughty, naughty" Chincha?). They introduced us to different kinds of foods, trends, trinkets, and more in Korea. They taught us more about Korea from a waygook's perspective with comparison videos, TL;DRs on different topics (everything from teaching to gender relations and more), and gave us a fantastic ramyun hack. The food ones have been especially fun, especially when Martina shows her recipes. That chocolate tofu pudding, on. point.

DOM & HYO

Dom is an English teacher in Korea, and he's currently engaged to Hyo. While their life as a couple, depicted in his cartoons, is adorable, I really love the site for their infographics on Korean vocabulary! He has a ton, and they're so fun and easy to use. Plus, he obviously has Hyo to make sure everything is correct, so you know you're getting good, easy information. I particularly love the infographics on food vocabulary because often I forget the names or never learn them (it's very easy to point and just try).

G-MARKET

It has an English section, albeit some more specific descriptions may require Google Translate. Simply find what you want to buy, add it to your shopping cart (make sure it's domestic, not international), and opt to pay via bank transfer. G-market will give you your own account under the same bank you want to transfer from (so no transfer fees), and simply go to an ATM or your online account, and transfer the money. In about two days (sometimes the NEXT day), you'll have whatever you ordered. The best? Shipping is usually free or the most is around 2,5000 won ($2.50). And you can find almost anything on G-Market. From new booties to camera accessories to lasagna noodles to CDs and more, it's all there.  

iHERB

Great for healthy or more conscious eaters. Heck, if you're in the USA, it's great for you too. You do need your home country credit or debit card (however, if you have a Korean credit card it will work), but it's about 4-5 days delivery to Korea, and it costs about $4.00 for up to 15 lb or $105. The prices on things are better than in Korea (like quinoa, dark chocolate, etc), and you can most likely find random things you won't be able to find at all here easily (like spirulina, actual whole wheat flour, oats).  

P.S. Use this code to get $10 off your purchase! LZF040 

WAYGOOK

An awesome site for general questions and a ton of lesson resources. Simply google Waygook and the name of your lesson, and you will be flooded with responses. Heck, even finding food can be helpful (it's how I discovered I can buy lasagna noodles on G-market!)

Have you tried any? I don't know what I'd do without these sites. When I started middle school teaching, I was totally lost until I looked up lesson ideas on Waygook, and iHerb has been crucial into my healthier eating habits!

[In the Mix] April

Ah! Oop! | Mamamoo ft. ESNA 

 Apple | GaIn ft. Jay Park

Five Years Time  | Noah and the Whales

Honey, I'm Good | Andy Grammar 

House Party | Sam Hunt

Ice Cream | Red Velvet

Little Bitty Pretty One | Thurston Harris

Neapolitan Dreams | Lisa Mitchell

New Romantics | Taylor Swift

Only You | missA

Pray to God | Calvin Harris ft. HAIM

Reflections | MisterWives

Trouble | Iggy Azalea ft. Jennifer Hudson

We Could Happen | AJ Rafael

Who's Your Mama? | JYP

Wonderland | Taylor Swift

Any recommendations? 

The Minimal Wardrobe

I have been incredibly interested in the concept of minimalism these past few months, and I've been reading almost everything I can online about it. It started with being aesthetically attracted to the typical images associated with minimalism-- white walls, clean floors, and, well, a minimal amount of stuff. I then stumbled upon Into Mind, a site dedicated to living a minimal life (it's more of an online book than a blog). She then featured Caroline and her blog Un-Fancy, which I'm obsessed with (talk about a cool concept and a very sweet soul). Eventually through Bloglovin', I stumbled across The Private Life of a Girl, and after reading her blog for hours one afternoon, I discovered her take on a minimal wardrobe. Between these three serving as both inspiration and sources of information, I began to formulate my own approach when it comes to my wardrobe.

While moving to a country where the XL is still typically too small for me has made me kind of follow Caroline's capsule wardrobe concept, I have found myself buying a lot on the occasions I make it out to H&M in Gwangju or Jeonju. And that kind of needs to stop. I have decided to try and follow Sophie's lead with her concept of the Minimal Wardrobe. I just took out my spring clothes from my suitcases, and after a bit of a shopping spree the weekend after returning from vacation at H&M and Uniqlo, I have put myself on a restriction. Including the two non-basic items I brought that weekend, I will only be allowed to buy five items a season. Here are her rules adapted to my life:

R U L E S:

1. Every season only buy five items. 
2. My seasons are defined as: March 1st-May 31, June 1-August 31, September 1-November 31, December 1-February 28/29*
3. Underwear, bras, and socks do not count, but should also not suddenly increase in amount.
4. Accessories (sunglasses, necklaces, bracelets, watches, tights) do not count, but should be purchased sparingly and only for high quality items.
5. Coats, shoes, and bags count.
6. Basics, within reason, do not count.
7. Basics are define as basic shirts or pants in black, white, or tan. 
8. Second hand items count. 

What do you think? I'm actually a little excited! I spent my teen years with such an interest in fashion and style, filling my room with a shoe corner, all sorts of unnecessary clothes, and magazine clippings, I want to start living a simpler, higher quality life. My wardrobe is the perfect place to start.

U L T I M A T E  G O A L S:

1. Begin to practice minimalism in my day to day life.
2. Ultimately save money.
3. Learn more about ethical and eco-conscious manufacturing
4. Learn more about what exactly constitutes as "higher quality"
5. Appreciate my clothes more
6. Narrow down and define my personal style
7. Become a more conscious consumer.

Over to you guys! All tips, stories of experience, and links to more resources are more than welcome.

*Yes, this means if I want to buy some things at home, I cannot shop too much during June and July! 

What Happened When I Stopped Putting Pressure on Myself

Ever since I was young, I've been a consummate over achiever. Here is what my senior year in high school looked like: 5 Advanced Placement Classes, anywhere from 10-20 hours of swimming a week (practice, weight room training, meets), roughly 5-10 hours of life guarding a week, random leadership positions in various clubs, and blogging. I was also consistently somewhat sick (constant coughing with "I'm fine!"), I had a huge mark on my face from some skin condition no one could quite figure out, constant fatigue (many a days were spent falling asleep in study hall hours), and I was really bad at learning how to express my frustrations or anger. Like really bad. I'm still working on it. 

In short, I seemed like I had my shit together, but I was miserable. I hardly hung out with people outside of swimming and school hours. I wasn't much fun. All I wanted to do when I was exhausted was crash and watch random K-pop videos and variety shows. It's sad, though, because if I'm being perfectly honest, I had this secret, slightly masochistic pleasure in being worked to the bone. What's with that? I liked being able to give someone a disdaining look when they were complaining about their workload and then spouting off about my own and pointing out how I had much more and was making it work. Yeah, guys, I was that chick.

I don't know why I was like that. To a lesser extent that over-achiever crept its way into my college years, and it's taken being out of that competitive, academic zone to find some sort of inner peace (how yogi of me, right?). I put a lot of pressure on myself through my academic career, and I frankly don't know why. I think I had these fantastical dreams about being famous for some crazy, cool thing I did when I was young. I wanted to get to that level of "I made it" before I hit twenty, but I had no actual passion for one specific thing. I always say, and I still do, that writing is my true passion, and one day I'll be this crazy novelist working silly hours pouring my heart into some inspiring, life changing story. However, I had been so busy trying to prove something (to me, to people, who knows?) that I lost what it meant to be a writer. 

How could I write about life when I wasn't experiencing it? My over-achiever path wasn't exactly leading to any breakthroughs, and it was having a serious impact on my over all pursuit of happiness. I was unhappy; I was lonely, and I often had this feeling of being insignificant. It's one thing to be a blip in a population of 6 billion; it's quite another to realize that in all of your various friend circles, your presence wasn't exactly missed. Like college admissions advises, it's better to be passionate about a few things than stretched out among a lot. The problem was that I thought I was passionate about everything, but really I just felt like I needed to do everything. Maybe I had a bit of FOMO? 

Anyhow, when I found myself miserable, slightly overweight, lonely, and consistently annoyed with everyone and everything, I knew it was time to make a change. I was saying goodbye to an important part of my life, and I was entering a new one. If any time was a time to change, it was then. 

I made a promise to myself that this first year in Korea would be, if anything, a time of improvement. I was going to relax. I was going to stop planning for the future down to every last detail. I was going to say yes when I wanted to say no and binge watch TV. I was going to stop looking at the negatives, and I was going to stop using "stress," "too busy," and "PMSing" as excuses. I would stop getting my feelings hurt over what I perceived as people "forgetting" me or not being able to hang out. I would do more, ask for more, give more, and I would just give myself a break. Forgive myself for the things I said and did, be proud of what I've accomplished no matter how little or big, and just live.

I'm not saying it's as easy as a few yoga sessions or some mirror talk, and bada-boom-bada-bam, you're cured of taking insane pleasure in your even more insanely over-achieving life. It takes a lot of personal reminders and a lot of pushing yourself out of your comfort zone and even your slight discomfort zone to get to a place of genuine happiness. It takes work. But the result, while slow, has so far been worth it.